Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Don't be afraid to speak up

I had so much anger inside of me because I felt the oral surgeon in Palatine that I went to should have known better. He should have said he could not treat me because he did not have the experience. And, he should have helped me find the right doctor who could.

I went through so much unnecessary pain, time, expense and suffering because I put my faith and health in the hands of someone I thought could medically treat me. Even though he never treated a cleft palate patient, he certainly knew how to perform oral surgery and treat an infection. So, I thought. He had a large successful practice and came with good recommendations. So, I thought I made the right decision. Boy, was I wrong.

After I went to the UIC, I found out that he should never have instructed me to wear the "flipper" after surgery. Evidently you don't want to wear any type of "flipper" or device that presses on the palate. The "flipper" was also a conduit for infection. That's why I got the yeast infection in my mouth. It was from wearing the mouthpiece. I also found out that cadaver bone is not the way to go. If you need to use bone-it should be taken from your hip because you are less likely to reject your own bone. But probably the most important thing I found out was that the oral surgeon I saw in Palatine was actually good friends with one of the dentists at the UIC Craniofacial center. I was incensed when I found this out. Why wouldn't the oral surgeon just refer me to his friend at the UIC Craniofacial center? When I asked him if he had ever treated a cleft palate patient he said "no" but reassured me that he could do the job. This kept me up at night and my anger towards him grew and grew. Now I am not an angry person. I like to think of myself as happy go lucky and see my heart with a smile. But, anger overtook me. It changed me. I became bitter. I would lay in bed at night and think why wouldn't he just refer me to his friend that specializes in the care of cleft palate patient's. My feeling is that he did this out of greed. Greed. My dental insurance did not cover a penny of his services. Anesthesia was also not covered. So, I paid $6,800 to go through hell! I think he also wanted to say that he "treated" a cleft palate patient.

So, what did I do? I could not live like this. I hated being angry at him. I hated walking around being mad. So, I called up his office and asked to speak with him. The receptionist asked what it was about and I told her it was "personal." He called me back within 10 minutes. I started the conversation by sating, "Doctor I know you will do the right thing". I then said the following. " I'm asking three things from you. One, if a patient comes in and you have never treated their particular medical condition, you have to refuse to treat them and help them find the appropriate doctor. I am going to send you business cards of Dr. Cohen and Dr. Reisberg. If a cleft palate patient comes into your office you have to refer them to these doctors. Second, if a patient wants their medical records you have to give it to them. You can't have your front desk employees refuse to give the patient their records. They said they can only send it to another doctor but that is not correct. I own those medical records and they are mine. He responded by saying that he would send me my records if I could read his "chicken scratch". I said that I'm a nurse and know how to read doctors notes. And, 3rd, I want my money back. I want you to send me the $6,800 that I paid you. Basically, I am having everything redone. I did not ask to be reimbursed for the countless antibiotic prescriptions, CT scan, ENT/plastic surgery consult or infectious disease consults. I just wanted the $6,800 back. But, really the most important thing I wanted was to prevent someone-maybe one person-from going what I went through. I wanted him to promise me to refer patients to appropriate doctors that could treat them. I was very calm when I talked to him and I ended the conversation by saying, "please give this your consideration. I believe you took it upon yourself to treat me because you thought you could. But, you and I both know that this was not the case. Give me a call when you have reviewed my 3 requests".
About two hours later I received a call back and he said he would do all three of my requests. Within two days I had my money back and received my medical records. I, in turn, mailed him business cards for Dr. Cohen and Dr. Reisberg as well as information on Face The Future Foundation which supports the UIC Craniofacial center.

And, after I hung up the phone something instantly happened. The anger that I had disappeared. I felt peace. I no longer thought about this terrible oral surgeon. I hoped that this changed him as well. I hope and believe that he will do the right thing when a cleft palate patient comes into his office for dental care. I believe he will refer these patients out and not take them on as patients.

Now, I could have hired a lawyer and tried to sue him for his incompetence. But, I did not want to do this. I had already gone through so much and that is the last thing I wanted to have to go through.

This story could have a very different ending. Instead of moving on and learning from this experience, I could have walked around with anger and a heavy heart. Anger could be with me today. But, I spoke up. I said my peace. And, I tried to be an advocate for other people that may walk in my shoes.

If you would have told me that I would call up a doctor and call them on bad medical care and make some requests that could possibly impact future patients I would not have believed it. But, I'm getting older. And, something happens as the years go by. You become more confident in saying what is right and what is wrong.

My girlfriend who recommended the oral surgeon apologized to me twice saying both times that she was so sorry that she recommended this doctor and that I had to go through so much. I said, " it's the best thing that has happened to me. It changed my life for the better. It helped define who I am and it's made me a stronger person."

This was just the beginning of my transformation.

In the next few blogs I will tell you what doors were opened for me. They say one door closes and another door opens. But, you have to be willing to open that door.

2 comments:

  1. How incredibly brave you are Pat. What a wonderful heart you have to turn your painful experience into a positive. Thank you for sharing in order to help so many..

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  2. I admire not only your interaction with the oral surgeon but blogging about your experience and about the anger inside of you and how you released it. Kudos to you on how you handled the entire situation

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